


Monster

by jessthesohodoll



Series: The Watcher of the eternal flame (A Grant Ward os series) [1]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: F/M, Grant Ward - Freeform, Multi, redeption, this is wat it should be heppened
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-27
Updated: 2014-05-27
Packaged: 2018-01-26 19:45:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,061
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1700297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jessthesohodoll/pseuds/jessthesohodoll
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Grant Ward comes to terms with his inner demons and he try to save the team.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Monster

**Author's Note:**

> OS pre 1x21 and post 1x20 ... possible spoilers. Fic inspiride by the song "Monster" by imagine dragons (x)

 

 

 

 _I'm only a man with a candle to guide me,_  
I'm taking a stand to escape what's inside me.  
A monster, a monster,  
I've turned into a monster,  
A monster, a monster,  
And it keeps getting stronger.

 

 

Being afraid is normal, it's a natural emotion. It pushes you to always have the defenses raised, to never lower your guard. It was one of the first things we were taught in the academy.

 

_**But what can you do when what you're afraid of is yourself?** _

 

Grant Ward is not afraid of anything, he is the perfect agent, even if what you see outside is definitely not what is inside. It's what all belive i'm. But I have fears too, too many. I am a monster, a man who is afraid of his own shadow and this time I don't speak of my Asgardian anger who occasionally return to visit me.

 

My monster has only one name:  _ **John Garrett.**_

 

I was only 15 years old when he took me out of the reformatory.

"Let me teach you how to be a man," he told me.

Training with him was the worst thing a kid could ever do, but it made me what I am now: a monster, his little creation. But I'm not done more to create, I can no longer shape as he wishes. It changed me, destroyed me from the inside. It's as if that part of me had died. It made me believe I owed him everything, owe him my own life, when all he has done is take away from a hell to put in a one lot worse.

 

The reality is that I do not owe him nothing, since I no longer have a life.

 

_**My life has run away with Skye.** _

 

Now she's sitting with her wrists bound with what was on our team. They tried to get inside the Bus but they were in the minority.

 

I am no longer that kid, now is the time to do the right thing.

" A penny for your thoughts , son ," Garrett says, startling me .

" Nothing important ," I say , staring at the loading bay where Coulson and others are.

"Hey Grant , I understand what you're feeling ," and so saying he supports me a hand booby shoulder "you are fond of them , especially that girl. I should have known that after all you are not a real robot "and blurts out an evil laugh "Diden't you lost faith in the cause I hope! "

" No sir "

" Well, good . Now go to the girl and let her tell you the damn password. I have no more time to waste on the whims of a little girl. " He replies .

" And the other members of the team? " I wonder .

" Tell them what you want. Just remember that when i come back,I don't want to see any of them breathe , "he says , walking away.

 

 

The girl in question is staring at me without fear . Despite everything , I can't stop thinking about her. Of how,after so much time she has managed to make me feel alive. Of how her eyes can make me tremble inside.

 

 

If that means love, I am madly in love with Skye.

 

 

" The time has come ," Garrett says , returning with a gun in his hand.

 

He want me to do that for which I was trained :kill people for him. But this time I can't do it, now is the time to disobey an order.

 

 

Because I own so much more to Coulson , he tried to give me something to fight for , a family. Because I own so much more to Skye , she taught me what it means to love .

 

 

I see them sitting there , and I want to do something.

 

 

Coulson tries to reassure them ,May stares into space with his usual expression exactly as Tripp , while Fitz tries to reassure Simmons who cries desperately even though he is scared to death . He is the only one who still believes in me , and I 'm treating exactly as I did with my brothers.

 

 

And then there's her, my Rockie . She will not stop staring at me with those eyes that manage to pass me by . Maybe I've lost her forever, but at least she will be free . In the end, she deserves someone better than me.

 

 

Now I have to save someone , someone to fight for.

 

 

I approach them with uncertainly , Garrett is there and he is certainly still watching and I have to invent something.

 

 

" Do what you have to do Ward. No hard feelings . " Says Coulson , while May diden't even look up .

"C'mon Ward , I know that you care about us ," said Fitz , while Jemma is crying and Tripp looks up to stare at me.

Fitz is right, I care about them,To each of them . Coulson is like a father , May is surly that kind of mum you woulden't want to ever have, Jemma and Leo are my little brothers and Tripp is much more than a brother.

 

 

But then i arrive to her . She raise those chocolate brown eyes and I feel shaking.

 

 

"I know that somewhere, there is still some good in you ," she whispered , " if you have to prove something, this is the time to do it."

 

 

And as usual she always manages to read my thoughts. I smile , trying to make her understand my true intentions and with the knife I make them free one by one.

 

 

" Go , you are free ," I tell them.

"I knew Ward ! I have always believed! There is still some good in you , " Fitz says .

"Go , before Garrett come back to see why I'm putting so much " I scream , opening the cargo door but Skye remains firm where she is.

 

 

"Please Skye " I scream.

"I 'm not leaving without you ," she says , coming closer.

" Skye, goes with them . Please "

" Ward , come with us . You still have time " Fitz presses .

"I have to fix things "

"I love you Grant" Skye says to me , making me miss a beat.

 

 

Is this what it feels like to be loved?

 

 

" I love you too Skye " I say , kissing her forehead , " I will come to you. I promise "

" Do you promise? "

"I could never leave you again," and in doing so , she runs behind the others . Garrett and I have an unfinished business .

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

_**It's never too late to escape from your own demons .** _


End file.
